Dear Macyn,
We had our baby shower today! You are SO very loved....now I just want you to be here!
I want you to be here so badly its almost painful! My heart yearns to hold you and kiss you and love you! I imagine you in all these little clothes! I imagine laying you down into your beautiful crib! I imagine winding your mobile for you! I imagine reading books to you! I imagine snuggling with you! I imagine feeding you and changing you and swaddling you! I imagine bathing you and smelling your clean skin!
I just can't wait.
Please hurry up!
....but please take your time! I want you big, strong, and healthy! So how about we agree upon the first week of October or so?
I love you little girl! I love you with all of my heart, forever and always!
Love,
Mommy
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Suddenly overwhelmed
Well here's a very quick update of today/this weekend.
We had our baby shower today and it was amazing. We had SO much fun and got a lot of necessary stuff! Everyone was so generous and really helped us out! I love going through everything and looking at it and sorting it. Everyone put a lot of work into the shower, Kelly, Jan, Jenn, Pat, Mom. It was a lot of work.
We had candy and sweets as the theme, so all the food was pretty much deserts. I made a banner that said Macyn, Kelly made a topiary out of tootsie roll pops (so CUTE!), We had candy at the center pieces, wash clothes rolled to look like lollipops, cupcakes, and cookies....lots of good stuff. I made a watermelon fruit bowl that was carved to look like a baby carriage. There was pink punch! It was great.
I didn't eat too much because I went and socialized with everyone as much as I could. I tried to make sure that I made the rounds and chatted with everyone. Scott's mom and sister, Mandy, came which was great. Lots of people from church and some good high school friends. It was a lot of fun to see people who I don't get to see that often, and probably won't get to too much when Macyn arrives.
Scott also stopped by the shower, which was great! He brought flowers for the grandma's to be, and the ladies who helped plan the shower. He helped open gifts, ate some food, and played a few games. It was nice having him there and getting to formally introduce him to a lot of people who hadn't really met him in person before!
Suddenly I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by all the things I need to do. I'm SO exhausted, and feel like as soon as my head hits the pillow, I would just sleep forever. But earlier tonight, Mom, Pat, and I went through all of the shower presents. I took all of the tags off of the clothes and things that needed to be washed. I tried to organize things, but just made big messy piles. I had a huge trash pile too. So after watching Big Brother and going for a little walk, I thought I was going to bed. Well then I decided I had to throw the trash away. Then I decided I had to put all of the clothes and washable things in a laundry basket. Well that turned into going through all her crib bedding and sheets. Which turned into me wanting to hang up the diaper stacker, which turned into me putting all the diapers away. Which turned into me putting things together and moving things away from the bed. It just spiraled and now I'm sitting here looking at all the time I spent down here (an hour at LEAST) and how much there is still to do!!
I have TONS of laundry to do! (I had an OVERFLOWING basket just with the clothes and bedding Macyn received today at her shower, that does not include clothing and blankets she already had and OUR clothes!!)
I would REALLY like to take a bath tonight though! I feel SO stressed now with everything to do, and I put on bug spray so my skin feels GROSS! But the only bathtub I COULD take a shower in is all the way upstairs and its SO small! I would love to take some of Macyn's bedtime bath wash, and curl up in mom's big bathtub and just relax! Michelle Rustler gave me a great book on how to put baby on a schedule and help her sleep. I would love to just curl up in the warm water and read that book!
At least it was nice out today! It was my perfect summer weather. It was in the seventies and there was no hot sticky humid air! It was great. When we came back from the shower (we had invited family to come over, but the shower ran long so most people had to head home or had other plans) we came home and dad had made shredded chicken, beans, chips, potato salad, and fruit salad. So we sat on the deck, ate and talked. It was so nice! So at least I didn't have to feel crabby hot! I was pretty warm at the shower, but it was okay, I survived!
Oh but ... the bummer part is, the rest of the night I've been feeling like I'm getting sick. I've had a sore throat and its just getting progressively worse!
We had our baby shower today and it was amazing. We had SO much fun and got a lot of necessary stuff! Everyone was so generous and really helped us out! I love going through everything and looking at it and sorting it. Everyone put a lot of work into the shower, Kelly, Jan, Jenn, Pat, Mom. It was a lot of work.
We had candy and sweets as the theme, so all the food was pretty much deserts. I made a banner that said Macyn, Kelly made a topiary out of tootsie roll pops (so CUTE!), We had candy at the center pieces, wash clothes rolled to look like lollipops, cupcakes, and cookies....lots of good stuff. I made a watermelon fruit bowl that was carved to look like a baby carriage. There was pink punch! It was great.
I didn't eat too much because I went and socialized with everyone as much as I could. I tried to make sure that I made the rounds and chatted with everyone. Scott's mom and sister, Mandy, came which was great. Lots of people from church and some good high school friends. It was a lot of fun to see people who I don't get to see that often, and probably won't get to too much when Macyn arrives.
Scott also stopped by the shower, which was great! He brought flowers for the grandma's to be, and the ladies who helped plan the shower. He helped open gifts, ate some food, and played a few games. It was nice having him there and getting to formally introduce him to a lot of people who hadn't really met him in person before!
Suddenly I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by all the things I need to do. I'm SO exhausted, and feel like as soon as my head hits the pillow, I would just sleep forever. But earlier tonight, Mom, Pat, and I went through all of the shower presents. I took all of the tags off of the clothes and things that needed to be washed. I tried to organize things, but just made big messy piles. I had a huge trash pile too. So after watching Big Brother and going for a little walk, I thought I was going to bed. Well then I decided I had to throw the trash away. Then I decided I had to put all of the clothes and washable things in a laundry basket. Well that turned into going through all her crib bedding and sheets. Which turned into me wanting to hang up the diaper stacker, which turned into me putting all the diapers away. Which turned into me putting things together and moving things away from the bed. It just spiraled and now I'm sitting here looking at all the time I spent down here (an hour at LEAST) and how much there is still to do!!
I have TONS of laundry to do! (I had an OVERFLOWING basket just with the clothes and bedding Macyn received today at her shower, that does not include clothing and blankets she already had and OUR clothes!!)
I would REALLY like to take a bath tonight though! I feel SO stressed now with everything to do, and I put on bug spray so my skin feels GROSS! But the only bathtub I COULD take a shower in is all the way upstairs and its SO small! I would love to take some of Macyn's bedtime bath wash, and curl up in mom's big bathtub and just relax! Michelle Rustler gave me a great book on how to put baby on a schedule and help her sleep. I would love to just curl up in the warm water and read that book!
At least it was nice out today! It was my perfect summer weather. It was in the seventies and there was no hot sticky humid air! It was great. When we came back from the shower (we had invited family to come over, but the shower ran long so most people had to head home or had other plans) we came home and dad had made shredded chicken, beans, chips, potato salad, and fruit salad. So we sat on the deck, ate and talked. It was so nice! So at least I didn't have to feel crabby hot! I was pretty warm at the shower, but it was okay, I survived!
Oh but ... the bummer part is, the rest of the night I've been feeling like I'm getting sick. I've had a sore throat and its just getting progressively worse!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Keeping it up
I've been keeping my mood up pretty much consistently this week. I've had a few tough times, but for the most part...I'm doing okay so far.
Its only Wednesday, but I've been feeling okay!
Tuesday I had an appointment with Carrie, a massage therapist, that helped a lot. Then today I relaxed until I went to hang out with Abbey. Abbey has been in New York since the end of May, so I haven't seen her in awhile. It was nice hanging out and chatting for a few hours.
Tomorrow I'm working at church from 8-2, then Hannah is coming over and we are going to pick Pat up from the airport!! I'm so excited to see both of them. I don't get to see Hannah a lot, and I rarely get to see Pat obviously. It'll be a nice day I hope!
Friday I have a doctor appointment. It's my first two week appointment! We are 32 weeks now and its starting to become really real!
I'm SO excited for Sunday! Its our baby shower on Sunday and I cannot wait!! :)
Its only Wednesday, but I've been feeling okay!
Tuesday I had an appointment with Carrie, a massage therapist, that helped a lot. Then today I relaxed until I went to hang out with Abbey. Abbey has been in New York since the end of May, so I haven't seen her in awhile. It was nice hanging out and chatting for a few hours.
Tomorrow I'm working at church from 8-2, then Hannah is coming over and we are going to pick Pat up from the airport!! I'm so excited to see both of them. I don't get to see Hannah a lot, and I rarely get to see Pat obviously. It'll be a nice day I hope!
Friday I have a doctor appointment. It's my first two week appointment! We are 32 weeks now and its starting to become really real!
I'm SO excited for Sunday! Its our baby shower on Sunday and I cannot wait!! :)
Monday, August 9, 2010
Dear Macyn 3
Dear Macyn,
I just read that around 34 weeks (we are 32 right now! amazing!) I will start to feel you less, especially kicks and punches, because you will start to be so big and run out of room to stretch out. I just wanted to let out how much I have LOVED and enjoyed this time where you've been able to kick me. I love feeling your movements. I find it amazing that I can feel when you move and what position you might be in. I like knowing you are awake and moving around. I can't wait to see those little movements outside of my tummy!
I'm excited to be farther along, and the idea that you will be here SO soon...but I'm going to miss these exciting days of watching my belly bounce! :)
I love you Macyn! Forever and Always,
love,
Mommy
I just read that around 34 weeks (we are 32 right now! amazing!) I will start to feel you less, especially kicks and punches, because you will start to be so big and run out of room to stretch out. I just wanted to let out how much I have LOVED and enjoyed this time where you've been able to kick me. I love feeling your movements. I find it amazing that I can feel when you move and what position you might be in. I like knowing you are awake and moving around. I can't wait to see those little movements outside of my tummy!
I'm excited to be farther along, and the idea that you will be here SO soon...but I'm going to miss these exciting days of watching my belly bounce! :)
I love you Macyn! Forever and Always,
love,
Mommy
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Dear Macyn 2
Dear Macyn,
I'm so tired lately. You are not even here yet and I'm already exhausted. You are wearing me out my dear. I think we should cuddle up together and take an AWESOME long nap!
Are you tired? It doesn't seem like it. You're quite the mover and shaker lately :) I love feeling you push your whole body against my tummy skin.
Yesterday I could see you jiggle my whole belly. That is one of my favorite things to see lately. You've been able to move my belly for awhile, but I just love to see it. You're getting so big and so strong.
We are 31 weeks along now. I can't believe that I will get to see your beautiful face, hold your hands, kiss your little feet, touch your long fingers, squeesh your little chubby cheeks....all in about nine weeks! Its amazing! You're poking my side as I type this...I think you are excited too!
Your baby shower is in almost a week now! I'm getting so excited! We picked up your stroller and car seat Tuesday night. It is amazing to see. Its becoming so real. I just imagine putting your little body in that car seat. Strapping you in, keeping you safe, putting you in the back of our car, and driving you home. Its amazing to know its coming soon.
I'm so ready to meet you...but I'm scared to let you out of the safety of my tummy. I know that I will do my best to keep you safe, but its different now. When you are inside of me, I know that I can hold you tight and surround you with love. I can keep you safe and make sure no one ever hurts you. You can hear my heartbeat and I can grow yours. Bigger and stronger everyday.
I know that I will just become a great mommy and learn as you grow. I will keep you safe as I can and you will grow bigger and stronger everyday...except now in front of my eyes.
I love you with all of my heart. Forever and always.
Love,
Mommy
I'm so tired lately. You are not even here yet and I'm already exhausted. You are wearing me out my dear. I think we should cuddle up together and take an AWESOME long nap!
Are you tired? It doesn't seem like it. You're quite the mover and shaker lately :) I love feeling you push your whole body against my tummy skin.
Yesterday I could see you jiggle my whole belly. That is one of my favorite things to see lately. You've been able to move my belly for awhile, but I just love to see it. You're getting so big and so strong.
We are 31 weeks along now. I can't believe that I will get to see your beautiful face, hold your hands, kiss your little feet, touch your long fingers, squeesh your little chubby cheeks....all in about nine weeks! Its amazing! You're poking my side as I type this...I think you are excited too!
Your baby shower is in almost a week now! I'm getting so excited! We picked up your stroller and car seat Tuesday night. It is amazing to see. Its becoming so real. I just imagine putting your little body in that car seat. Strapping you in, keeping you safe, putting you in the back of our car, and driving you home. Its amazing to know its coming soon.
I'm so ready to meet you...but I'm scared to let you out of the safety of my tummy. I know that I will do my best to keep you safe, but its different now. When you are inside of me, I know that I can hold you tight and surround you with love. I can keep you safe and make sure no one ever hurts you. You can hear my heartbeat and I can grow yours. Bigger and stronger everyday.
I know that I will just become a great mommy and learn as you grow. I will keep you safe as I can and you will grow bigger and stronger everyday...except now in front of my eyes.
I love you with all of my heart. Forever and always.
Love,
Mommy
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Dear Macyn
Dear Macyn,
Today we got to see your sweet face for the first time. I fell in love all over again. At your 20 week anatomy scan you decided you didn't want to show us your pretty little face. You wanted to wait and surprise us...well my darling, as you will learn some day, your mommy is not the most patient of human beings.
We had a 3D ultrasound today and got to look at what you will really look like... or I guess what you look like right now. You're the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on. You have the most beautiful pouty lips, long slender fingers, big chubby cheeks, hair (!), and everything. You're so perfect.
I remember when I first found out we were expecting you. I was so scared. I wasn't sure I was ready for you...and I'm still not. How will I ever know until you get here? But even though I was scared, within 24 hours I was so in love and so protective of you, I would have done anything to help you grow and protect your little body.
You're already my pride and joy. I'm just dreaming of what amazing things you'll do one day. You already amaze more than anything. I want the moon and stars for you. I will move mountains to make you happy and help you become a strong woman one day!
I cannot wait to see your for the first time and hold your little body in my arms! I cannot wait to see your daddy get to hold you for the first time. Your Grandma Judy said today that soon your daddy will get to hold you after months of me holding you. I'm so excited to share you...but not just yet. I want to hold you awhile longer and help you grow big and strong. You are my love and my heart. I cannot wait for you to arrive so that I can fall head over heels in love with you all over again.
My beautiful little girl, I love you with all my heart, forever and always!
love,
Mommy
Today we got to see your sweet face for the first time. I fell in love all over again. At your 20 week anatomy scan you decided you didn't want to show us your pretty little face. You wanted to wait and surprise us...well my darling, as you will learn some day, your mommy is not the most patient of human beings.
We had a 3D ultrasound today and got to look at what you will really look like... or I guess what you look like right now. You're the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on. You have the most beautiful pouty lips, long slender fingers, big chubby cheeks, hair (!), and everything. You're so perfect.
I remember when I first found out we were expecting you. I was so scared. I wasn't sure I was ready for you...and I'm still not. How will I ever know until you get here? But even though I was scared, within 24 hours I was so in love and so protective of you, I would have done anything to help you grow and protect your little body.
You're already my pride and joy. I'm just dreaming of what amazing things you'll do one day. You already amaze more than anything. I want the moon and stars for you. I will move mountains to make you happy and help you become a strong woman one day!
I cannot wait to see your for the first time and hold your little body in my arms! I cannot wait to see your daddy get to hold you for the first time. Your Grandma Judy said today that soon your daddy will get to hold you after months of me holding you. I'm so excited to share you...but not just yet. I want to hold you awhile longer and help you grow big and strong. You are my love and my heart. I cannot wait for you to arrive so that I can fall head over heels in love with you all over again.
My beautiful little girl, I love you with all my heart, forever and always!
love,
Mommy
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Day by Day
just an update of things.
I'm so depressed.
I keep telling myself that I need to take it day by day.
But what do you do when each day is worse than the next?
What do you do when you can BARELY make it through a day?
Yesterday I barely made it through the day with my sanity.
Its gotten to the point where I just want to give up on everything.
I've never been this depressed in my life.
I can't do it anymore.
I just keep holding on to hope that things will speed up.
A few positives I need to remember:
-3D ultrasound on Tuesday
-Baby shower in two weeks
....thats really all I can think of right now. :(
I'm so depressed.
I keep telling myself that I need to take it day by day.
But what do you do when each day is worse than the next?
What do you do when you can BARELY make it through a day?
Yesterday I barely made it through the day with my sanity.
Its gotten to the point where I just want to give up on everything.
I've never been this depressed in my life.
I can't do it anymore.
I just keep holding on to hope that things will speed up.
A few positives I need to remember:
-3D ultrasound on Tuesday
-Baby shower in two weeks
....thats really all I can think of right now. :(
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